Consistency is My Superpower
It’s not sexy and it’s not exciting but it is the principle that has made the biggest difference to my life over the past three years of launching and running my new business: consistency. Or my version of consistency at least which is considered, strategic habits and routines - built for ease.
All my life I’ve considered myself ‘undisciplined’ or ‘lacking will power’. A pretty harsh self assessment but often true. In the past couple of years I’ve learnt to deal with this by practising consistency instead of discipline.
So what’s the difference? When I think about discipline, I think about making myself do something I don’t want to do. It feels punitive and off putting. When I think about consistency, I think about gently chipping away, day after day, to get where I want to go. The language change alone makes such a difference to me.
In practice, my version of consistency means:
I set the bar low for the habits and practices that I want to focus on,
I track what I do using a mix of Google tasks and the Atoms app,
I remove or add friction as needed depending on if I want to help myself do something or stop myself from doing it.
Here is what this looks like in my business:
Schedule all repeating activities
Every Monday my calendar reminds me it’s finance time. Once a quarter it reminds me to review my intentions. Every second Thursday it reminds me to send a newsletter. These are repeating activities so surely I don’t need the reminders? The opposite is true. These are foundational tasks, necessary for the success of my business and achieving my goals. They are crucial and thus reminders are key for doing these tasks consistently. Plus the sense of accomplishment I get from ticking off these repeating tasks daily, weekly and monthly makes me feel the consistency at a physical level.
Split tasks into tiny bite sized pieces (and schedule each of them)
If I’m struggling to do something I break it down into tiny bits and put the first bit on my calendar. Or I tell myself I’ll just do the tasks for 15 minutes. Or write one paragraph of my newsletter. I prioritise starting, or doing, not completing, as a way into the thing I’m avoiding.
Look for patterns of flow or resistance and adjust as needed
Part of my coaching practice is that I send my clients homework to complete before their next session. Eventually I realised that the best time to send homework was straight after the session. Do I feel like sending it after an hour spent in deep focus and dialogue? No, I do not. But I noticed that the longer I left it, the harder I found it to send the homework - time made the internal resistance grow. I now allow myself up to 48 hours to send homework. I manage to meet this deadline 85% of the time. A high bar would have me send this immediately post session each time. I can’t meet that high bar and constantly missing it would demotivate me. Instead, consistently meeting my 48 hour deadline energises me and encourages me to aim for 24 hours whenever I can.
PLUS: I pay attention to what makes me feel good
Paradoxically, often the things that make you feel good are not in themselves enjoyable in the moment. I know unequivocally that when I start my day with exercise and mediation, my brain feels better, my body feels better, and my energy levels are far more stable. The truth is I rarely want to meditate, I just want the outcome. I find doing exercise is a bit easier, but getting up early to do it not so much. For both, I focus on how I’m going to feel on the other side and use that to get me started and through it. Plus, I tick it off in the Atoms app upon completion. Tracking that consistency makes me SO happy.
The fun thing about consistency is that day by day, it builds on itself. Practising it has added up to a stable and growing business that I can run and deeply enjoy while still having time to spend with my family and do fun things with friends. But it is also the main contributing factor to feeling ready for more, in the form of growth and challenge, which was my bigger goal all along.
A Surprising Route to the Best Life Possible
If you want to feel inspired to find your own version of consistency, the above article by David Brooks is a profound and beautiful read. It shows the beauty that can come from persistence and doing hard things.
I loved nearly all of it but three quotes for you to muse on -
On prioritising the big picture over the short term comfort:
Self-control is often the art of using a bigger desire to conquer a smaller desire. Once you commit to some vast possibility — loving your child, country or God — some of the lesser distractions and preferences (avoid pain at all costs) seem less compelling.
On finding what compels you to commit to hard things, and in the process uncover your true Self:
In all these cases, there is a moment of ignition, something outside touching something deep inside, the opening up of new personal possibilities. I think of these as annunciation moments, moments when one is called, moments that prefigure so much of what happens in a life. “Where is your Self to be found?” the Austrian poet Hugo Von Hofmannsthal asked. “Always in the deepest enchantment you have experienced.”
On how to move from interest to expertise:
The next stage of any calling or vocation is curiosity. When you’re in love with someone, you can’t stop thinking about her. You want to learn all there is to know. Curiosity is the eros of the mind, a propulsive force…Curiosity drives you to explore that dark cave despite your fears of going down there. Curiosity is leaping ahead of the comfortable place you’ve settled and dragging you into the unknown.…Like any passion, curiosity has to be transformed from a raw instinct to a methodical skill. When they are at their best, schools teach students how to arouse and discipline their curiosity. The effectively curious people have cognitive enthusiasm (they like to explore mysteries and think about new things), cognitive confidence (they are brave enough to tackle hard problems) and cognitive complexity (they don’t settle for simple stereotypes).
I offer holistic professional coaching, business advisory and team training. If you are interested in working with me in 2025 you can book an intro chat, visit my website or email me at holly@holly-garber.com.
This was a really insightful read thank you for sharing. [Adds calendar reminders for essential tasks instantly]